I Just Need You Here
by Rainbow.Dinosaur.xX
Summary: Izuku and Katsuki are art students who end up at the same party to reveal some deep and dark secrets. I rewrote this story for BNHA Angst Week 2019. Day 3 prompt 2/10– empty/scars. TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THE FOLLOWING. Self harm. Eating disorders. Drug use. Alcohol use. Additional tags: Aged up characters. Alternative universe— no quirks. College AU. Angst with a happy ending


"So are you coming?"

Izuku read that text at least 10 times trying to form a response. He knows he should go, knows that being social is good for him. His therapist makes a point to tell him about the importance of being social every two weeks when he sees her. Still doesn't make him want to go. Izuku doesn't party, doesn't go out, doesn't do more than go to class, get food, and go to therapy. This wasn't the life that a twenty-two year old college student should have. He really should go.

He socializes at dinner, that should be enough right? Ochako, the same person who sent him the text, insists that they eat dinner together every night. Shoto will normally join them too. They feel like they are his only friends. Sure he has "friends" but not like them. They seem to care about him, they talk to him, listen to him, force him out of his room. Everyone else is just someone he talks to in class, an acquaintance.

It's not that he doesn't like to see Ochako and Shoto at dinner, he does, it's just if he had it his way, all his meals would be taken to his room. Or he wouldn't even eat at all. The pain and fatigue of starving himself was addicting. It was a form of self harm that he could hide from his therapist. He's not anorexic.. He eats, Ochako sees him eat at least once a day. But that was all he ate. Breakfast was coffee, lunch was more coffee, and sometimes he had an energy drink.

By the time dinner rolls around he's hungry, but not that hungry. He's trained his body and mind to survive on very little food. So dinner isn't much, but it's enough for his friends not to worry. They know he borderline starves himself, but there isn't much they can do about it. Shoto is a business major and is studying to one day to take over his father's company. He's taking 18 credit hours and is interning with his father on top of his full class load. It's a miracle that he is even able to eat dinner with them at all. And Ochako is premed, her class load is insane.

Izuku is an art major. He has dreams of one day making art his full time job. He's a pretty good artist too. He chose UA College because it had a wide range of majors to choose from, and it was one of the better art schools in the area. It was also one of the only schools to offer him a full ride. His mom is a single parent, and although he would have qualified for a large about of financial aid, he was grateful not to have college debt when he graduated.

The only other person who he considered to be his "friend" was someone he grew up with. Someone who he swears if he didn't know any better was following him. They have been in the same school together since preschool. He gave him the nickname 'Deku" when they were in kindergarten because of the way his name looked on paper. Little Izuku didn't care at the time that Katsuki was calling his useless..older Izuku however, hated it.

Katsuki, whom he has been calling 'Kacchan' for most his life, has gone from his best friend, to his bully, to his rival. They are both art majors, and were both at the top of their class in both academics and artistic talent in high school. Katsuki's strengths are in photography, and painting. Izuku's strengths are in painting and ceramics. Their high school has an art show each year that allows the winner of the show to have their art on display at a gallery all summer. Katsuki won the contest their freshman year, Izuku won sophomore, Katsuki won again junior year, and they tied senior year. Katsuki hated losing. Katsuki made a point before they started their freshman year of college to tell Izuku he would surpass him.

Asides from being his rival, he's had a crush on Katsuki since middle school. Although he was sure his crush was one sided, he did know that Katsuki was and is into guys. He dated this tall purple haired freak their junior and senior year. This guy is flamboyantly gay, and was a clingy weirdo that constantly looked tired. Izuku wanted nothing more than to stab him with one of his paint brushes. Izuku was pretty sure Katsuki never really liked him, only dated him so he had someone to take to prom junior and senior year. Who cares if he also heard that he was exceptionally good in bed. Katsuki wouldn't have broken up with him if he truly cared about him.

Izuku is a very gifted artist, the way he is able to capture emotion in his paintings, and sculpts the human form is impressive. Before he started getting teased in middle school, Katsuki used to complement Izuku's work, and even posed for him a few times so he could practice sculpting people. Katsuki's "friends" started to tease him about being gay for Izuku very early on in middle school, and since it would be another four years before twelve year old Katsuki would come out, he bullied Izuku instead. Called him a freak, and stopped hanging out with him.

That was when the marks started to appear on his arms.

The day Katsuki broke up with his weirdo boyfriend was the best day of Izuku's life. It was also when he found out they would be going to UA together, and when Katsuki started to treat him as an equal again. UA was not an easy school to get into. Their art program only accepts a select amount of new students each year. A newfound respect was formed when they both got accepted. UA College offers an internship to one senior each year to intern with the artist Toshinori Yagi, Katsuki and Izuku were both trying for that spot, and Katsuki was determined to get it.

Reading the text for the umteenth time, he checked the time. Eight pm. He really should go. He has no excuse not to. All his homework is done, and he finished his piece for ceramics due on Monday.. And there would be no way that Katsuki would be there.. Katsuki never partied.

Izuku- What time do you want me to be ready?

Ochako- YAY!! 10 minutes?! Wear something cute! There's going to be tons of cute guys there!

Izuku groaned and got out of bed to look at himself in the mirror. He didn't look that bad. He didn't look very good either. The black skinny jeans were OK, they were at least clean.. But the top would have to go. He can't go to one of Momo Yaoyorozu infamous house parties in an All Might hoodie. He was a proud nerd yes, but going to the party in a hoodie with an anime character on it would make Ochako cringe. He decides to put on a black button down instead. At least its clean.. and it still fits. His hair is a whole other issue, taming his curls is near impossible. Ochako convinced him to dye it a dark green last month, and he needed a touch up. Hopefully it would be dark at Momo's place.

He thought for a moment about rolling up his sleeves, it was warm outside, and this long sleeve shirt wasn't going to help him stay cool. Although there haven't been any new ones in a few months, there were a lot of old ones still scattered all over his arms that he didn't need Ochako to stare at tonight. It was hard to hide the fact that he hurt himself being an art student. He constantly had his sleeves up while at the pottery wheel, and when painting. No one really said anything in any of his classes, and for that he was grateful. At least there was never a reason for him to wear shorts, the marks on his thighs were a lot more recent.

Shoving on his signature red converse, and doing a quick brush of his teeth in his dorms bathroom, he grabbed his wallet and keys and walked out into the hallway. Ochako lived on the floor above him. When he looked down at his phone he saw that it's been a little over 10 minutes, so it was no surprise to see her bouncing down the hallway towards him.

"You ready to go?!"

Izuku tried his best to give the brightest smile he could muster.

"As ready as i'll ever be!"

Ochako wrapped her arms around him in a side hug and grabbed onto his hand squeezing it once before letting go.

"Good! Let's go, babe!"

Momo's wasn't too far away. Her parents paid for her to live in a fancy off campus penthouse apartment. It had multiple rooms and was gorgeous. It was also huge. Izuku and Ochako were probably going to spend the night here.. As were a whole lot of people. Momo was known to have tons of alcohol and other types of self indulgences at her parties. And Izuku was planning on getting high off his ass tonight. Unless Ochako decides to be his sober companion, he wasn't going to be able to walk home alone.

As soon as they got in they were greeted with a very happy, and very drunk Mina. Momo was behind her and was very, very sober.

"HI Ochako! HI Izuku!"

Mina almost knocked Izuku over when she jumped over to him to give him a hug. Returning the hug, he noted the strong scent of alcohol on her breath. The night was still young, Mina would probably be on her ass soon.

"H-hey Mina! Show me where the fun stuff is?"

Mina released her arms from around his waist and grabbed onto his wrist to take him fully inside. Ochako followed waving a hello to Momo as she shut the door behind them. There were already a ton of people there, Izuku didn't really recognize many of them, but Ochako was right, there were a lot of cute guys here.

When they got over to the bar area, Izuku took note of not only the massive amount of options he had to choose from drink wise, but the table with the cake pops. He looked over at Momo and motioned at the sweets.

"Are these what I think they are?"

A wicked smile came over Momo's face.

"Why yes they are! Made them this morning, they are 10 mg each!"

Izuku may not have many friends outside of Ochako and Shoto, but that doesn't mean he didn't know where to go when he wanted to get high. Momo was very good at making edibles, you name it, she made it. From your classic cookies and brownies, to hard candies and gummy bears. She knew just how much cannabis oil to use to makes them not only taste good, but get you flying higher than a kite on a windy day.

There were a few people in his art class that swore that they did their best work while high. They also talked about how it was the best sleep aid. Izuku knew he didn't need to be high to produce good word, but getting help falling asleep was something he needed from time to time. When he promised himself he would stop cutting as much, pot made things a lot better.

Being high was also one of the best feelings he's ever experienced. The loss of control, the way it washed away his anxiety, and how it made everything so damn funny was amazing. He also has the confidence to speak his mind, and get some of the best sleep.. his fellow art students weren't lying about that.

Izuku took two of the cake pops and popped one of them in his mouth and ate it so fast one would think he hadn't eaten in days. As he was popping the other into his mouth he noticed Momo and Ochako sharing a look before giving Izuku a side eye.

"Wh-what? I've done this before, don't look at me like that!"

The only one who didn't seem to care was Mina.

"Yeah you party poopers! Let Izuku have a good time! Now what can I get you guys to drink?!"

Both Izuku and Ochako asked for something sweet and watched with wide eyes as Mina whipped something up and handed it to them. Instead of downing it like he wanted to, he decided to sip on it for awhile. He knew in about 20 minutes he would be feeling pretty great! He also didn't need Ochako giving him another concerned look. As they walked around the penthouse they ended up making their way over to a room where a bunch of people were playing mario kart. As they were about to head in take a seat on the couch to watch, Izuku froze.

"O-Ochako.. W-we can't go in there."

Ochako scans the room and a knowing look comes over her face.

"Yes we can Izuku, tonight could be the perfect time to get closer to him y'know! And also.." a slight flush washed over her face. "Tenya is in there too.. I want to see him Izuku.. Come in with me?"

The look on her face was so sugary sweet, and she always does so much for Izuku, the he just couldn't say no. The cake pops he ate were also starting to hit him, so maybe she was right, maybe tonight would be the perfect time for him to try to talk to Katsuki about something other than the internship they applied for, and find out of his was still single.

"Okay, w-we can go inside."

Katsuki was sitting alone on one of the couches in the corner, and Iida was towards the front of the room near the TV. Ochako gently pushed Izuku towards the couch as she made her way over to Iida's side. As he was walking over to the couch, Katsuki's eyes moved away from the TV and locked eyes with Izuku. Katsuki was wearing black skinny jeans, a band shirt, and had in all his piercings. He had an eyebrow ring, an industrial, tongue ring, and a lip ring. He also had almost every spot on his ears done, it wasn't too much though, not to Izuku anyway.

He looked really hot.

Izuku walked over to him with his drink in hand and smiled. His confidence level always went up when he was high, and he was really starting to feel it now.

"Hey Kacchan.. Can I ah sit next to you?"

Katsuki looked him up and down again before looking away. He was holding on to a drink and took a long swig of it before patting the seat next to him. Izuku took that as an OK to sit down and plopped down next to him. He was sitting a lot closer to him that he intended, their legs and arms were touching, Izuku's cheeks flushed but instead of moving away, he leaned into Katsuki instead.

"What the fuck nerd? Did I say you could come cuddle with me?"

His voice was rough, but there was no attempt to move or push Izuku away. Izuku's blissed out mind took that as an invitation to lean in closer and lay his head on Katsuki's shoulder. Drunk and high Izuku was very clingy.

"Tch. What's with the long sleeves? It's hot as fuck outside, and this room is warm."

Izuku felt a ping of embarrassment. Katsuki was right, he really should have put on a short sleeved shirt and said 'fuck it' to all the stares he knew he was bound to get.

"You know why Kacchan. T-Too embarrassing."

Katsuki shifted his body moving to face Izuku head on, causing Izuku to slightly lose his balance as he no longer had a warm body to lean on. Without asking for permission, Katsuki grabbed onto Izuku's wrist and started to yank up his sleeve.

"Wahh! St-Stop it Kacchan! What's with you!?"

Choosing not to listen to the plea for him to stop, he pushed up the sleeve until his entire forearm was exposed. He then started gently running his hand up and down his arm, checking. Once he was satisfied, he moved to to the other arm.

"Ka-Kacchan stop! There isn't anything new there!"

Needing to see for himself, Katsuki yet again ignored him and finished his inspection. Small tears were starting to form in the corners of his eyes. It's been months since he's cut his arms. Katsuki sees his arms almost everyday in their painting class. Why doesn't he just look then?

Once he seemed satisfied that there wasn't any new marks, he let go of Izuku's arms and turned back towards the TV letting Izuku fall back onto him.

"Wh-what was that for Kacchan?"

Izuku tried to read the expression on Katsuki's face. Why did he care if Izuku had on long sleeves? They barely talked and hardly saw each other at all outside of class. Why now was he choosing to talk and act like he cared?

"You know I was the one to tell the school that you were doing that right?"

Izuku took a sip of his drink and blinked his eyes. He must be really high. Why were they having this conversation now? He must be talking about something else.

"Wh-what are you talking about Kacchan?"

Finishing off his drink, Katsuki looked down at Izuku and stared into the jade eyes in front of him for a few moments before looking away again.

"I told our teacher that I saw those marks during gym class, that's why you got called down to the nurses office. And why Auntie Inko made you go to the hospital."

Izuku knew it was someone in his class that told a teacher that they saw the marks on his arms. He remembers being pissed when his mom confronted him. He had managed to hide them for two years. Two whole years before anyone said anything. To find out it was Katsuki who told a teacher was, well, mind blowing. He was the last person Izuku thought would give a shit about him back then.

He ended up spending almost 3 months away from school to get treatment. Thankfully he was able to start his freshman year of high school on time. Going to the hospital didn't make him stop cutting though. It just made him be more careful. He was mad at his mom for sending him.

Guess that explains why Katsuki stopped bullying him. Being bullied was better than being ignored however. Katsuki acted like he didn't exist when they started high school. It hurt.

"Is that why you ignored me Kacchan? Because you realized that bullying me may have caused me to hurt myself? Did Auntie Mitsuki talk to my mom and then tell you to leave me alone Kac-chan?"

His head was spinning, the alcohol and pot were really hitting him now. He no longer felt in control of what he was saying.

"Huh? Is that it Kac-chan? Did you feel bad?"

Katsuki scowled and pushed Izuku off his shoulder.

"Fuck you."

Feeling bold, and not taking the hint, Izuku moved closer to Katsuki and whispered into his ear.

"Fuck me huh? I've wanted you to do that since I was fifteen. But im sure that's not what you meant. Was it Kac-chan?"

Izuku was reasonably sure even in his intoxicated state that Katsuki was blushing. It was rather cute if he was being honest.

"Sc-screw you Deku."

Izuku laughed and fell back into the couch cushions. He was laughing so hard and loud that a few people turned around to stare at him. Katsuki pinched Izuku's arm to get him to stop, and caused Izuku to yelp. Izuku was waiting for him to explode and storm out. But everything was just so funny in that moment. The room was spinning, and he could tell that Katsuki was embarrassed.

When Izuku finally calmed down he leaned back into Katsuki's side and practically purred into his ear.

"Screw me? You're expanding your vocabulary Kacchan. You should really take me home first if you want in my pants that bad. Or I can pounce you on the couch. Your choice Kac-chan."

Katsuki wasn't sure if he should be turned on, or pissed off. Izuku was clearly long gone. Katsuki wasn't one to talk though, the liquor he's been drinking must have affected him too. Why he decided it was OK for Izuku to cuddle with him, and why he choose now— of all the times he could have told him—that he was the one who got him sent to the hospital, was beyond him. Katsuki barely drank and was admittedly a bit of a light weight. He didn't like to muddy his mind with alcohol, clearly he was a little drunk.

If it wasn't for Kirishima dragging his ass to this party, he would have been perfectly content editing the photos he took last week to add to his portfolio. Just because he already sent his portfolio over to be chosen for the internship with Toshinori, didn't mean couldn't add more photos to show off his talent.

He came in here to watch Shitty Hair play Mario Kart, not to get seduced by Izuku and inspect his arms for new scars. As much as he tries not to stare, he can't help but take note of Izuku's arms when they were in class. Not only were they somehow toned, but the scars.. the scars yelled at him.

Mitsuki didn't yell at him when Izuku was sent to the hospital. She didn't yell at him when Auntie Inko told her that his therapist told her Inko that Izuku started to cut himself shortly after Katsuki started to bully him. Didn't yell at him when she told him that he had been cutting himself for two years. She also didn't tell him that it was all because of Katsuki. She didn't need to.

No, she didn't tell him it was his fault, or that he was to blame, but she did ask him if he was bullying him. Asked if he knew sooner than when he told the school that Izuku was hurting himself. Asked if he knew that his words and his actions hurt. Asked him stop, to leave Izuku alone if he couldn't find it in himself to be nice to him.

So he did. He tried his best to smash the feelings he had for Izuku, and chose to ignore him instead.

It was always Izuku. He knew even when he was twelve that he liked him. But he wasn't gay damnit! At least he didn't think he was back then. If if he did, he wasn't ready to be out in the open and to be teased for liking guys. His "friends" made it very clear to him that liking guys was not okay. So he chose to ignore his feelings, and make himself try to move on.

When he entered high school, he met Hitoshi. Hitoshi wasn't afraid about who he was. He dyed his hair a pastel purple for christ sake. Katsuki never met someone as confident about his sexuality as he was. He found himself drawn to him, Hitoshi also shamelessly hit on him every chance he got.

Dating him junior and senior year was interesting. As much as people liked to talk and say that they had sex, he never allowed him to do more than foreplay. And although it felt good, it didn't feel right. He wasn't Izuku. When his guidance counselor was talking to him about colleges and he said he wanted to go to UA, they mentioned that another student way applying there too. Said that the other student was also looking at the art program. It didn't take him long to realize who that other student was.

Breaking up with Hitoshi was a no brainer when he found out both him and Izuku got into UA. His mom told him. Mitsuki asked Katsuki to keep and eye on Izuku for Inko, make sure he took care of himself.

Katsuki spent the next three years watching Izuku. He watched him become a better artist, and competed like hell with him! But he also watched him dwindle away. Watched him get thinner, watched as new scars and marks appeared on his body. Watched who he hung around with. Watched as Ochako cried in the hallway the day he told her that she needed to convince Izuku to seek help again. He also watched his mom talk on the phone with Auntie Inko about how he went back to the hospital the summer before their senior year.

He was feeling himself become more and more attached to Izuku. But he also knew he couldn't be with him. Couldn't let Izuku know what he's done, how he's helped.

But there was something about this night—maybe it was the alcohol, or because Izuku came to him—but he felt like he could finally tell him. Probably because Izuku was drunk or high— possibly both—and that Katsuki was a coward, and knew he wouldn't remember his confession the next day. Or at least he hoped he didn't.

But hearing Izuku give a confession of his own, well that was not what he was expecting to hear. Izuku wasn't supposed to have feelings for him. Wasn't supposed to be attracted to him. Izuku was supposed to hate him. Was supposed to be afraid of him, resent him, want to fight him. He wasn't supposed to whisper sinful words about sex into his ear and to try to seduce him.

Izuku needed to go home.

"Who did you come here with Deku?"

Izuku moved away from his ear and gave him a crooked smile before pointing across the room.

"O-cha-ko. But she's busy with Ten-ya.. You gonna take me home Kac-chan? Take me into that big bed of yours and fuck me Kac-chan?"

Katsuki blushing hard, and turned his attention to trying to find Ochako in the room.

"W-wait here."

Katsuki got up to walk over to Ochako to tell her that he was indeed taking Izuku home. When he found her in the room, she thankfully didn't look too gone, but she had Tenya practically eating out of her hand.

"Oi, Roundface."

Ochako looked over at him with a big smile on her face.

"Baku! Hi! What's up? Where's Izuku? I thought you were sitting with him??"

"He's fine. But i'm taking him home. He's fuckin' wasted, he's out of his mind."

Ochako turned her head to look over at Izuku who looked to be completely blissed out on the couch.

"Yeah, he does seem a little toasty.. Take care of him kay? He really likes you y'know Baku. Talks about you all the time. S'you better not take advantage of him tonight! Or i'll ah, kick your ass!"

Katsuki rolled his eyes. Although he knew Ochako took self defense classes on the side, he figured she too must be pretty out of it to say that Izuku liked him.

"C'mon Roundface, that twerp doesn't like me, but m'takin' him back to my place anyway."

Ochako let out a laugh almost as loud as the one Izuku did earlier.

"OKAY Baku. Keep lyin' to yourself.. Tell him i'll call him tomorrow to make sure he's okay alright?"

Katsuki huffed.

"Fine… and ah.. Thanks."

Ochako winked at him as he was walking away. Katsuki felt suddenly much more sober than he did earlier.

He likes me eh? I really am lying to myself aren't I?

Izuku was practically passed out by the time he got back to the couch. He stopped to tell Kirishima he was leaving before scooping Izuku up in his arms to go home.

"Ooo carrying me out huh? Kacchan is so strong." Izuku stirred.

Katsuki looked down at Izuku and snarled.

"Can it nerd. Can you walk on yer own?"

Izuku nodded into his chest, and Katsuki slowly let him down and get him back on his feet. He kept an arm around his waist for balance as they walked out of Momo's apartment and over to the elevator.

Izuku looked up at Katsuki and wrapped his arms around his waist hugging him tightly to his chest.

"I've never been to Kacchan's before. Is it nice? Does Kacchan live alone?"

Katsuki's body was heating up, and his heart was pounding. Since when did this nerd get so bold and chatty?

"You'll see when you get there, and yeah, I live alone. The old hag paid for me to get an off campus apartment. You're lame ass is still in the dorms isn't it?"

Izuku looked over at him and stuck his tongue out.

"So what? I also have a full ride scholarship Kac-chan. Bet ya don't have that."

You're right, I don't.

"Whatever Nerd. Hurry up and get out of the elevator, I'm callin' us a cab."

Izuku stumbled out of the elevator, and followed Katsuki as quickly as he could outside. His big green doe eyes were staring up at him while he was on the phone like he was saving a cat from a tree. Katsuki almost gave the driver the wrong address he was so distracted. As soon as he was off the phone, he looked down at Izuku. He somehow managed to wind his arms back around Katsuki's waist and was clinging to his side.

"Stop lookin' at me like that."

Izuku's face flushed a violent shade of red as he looked down to the ground and kicked at his feet.

"Thank you for taking care of me Kacchan. I-I know you h-hate me, but m'gonna pretend you dont tonight.. Kay?"

I don't hate you Deku.

"Stop it Deku. Who said I hated you?"

Izuku cuddled his face like a cat into Katsuki's shoulder.

"No one. I just know Kacchan. B-but it's okay. I hate me too."

The ride back to Katsuki's place after the cab arrived, was done in silent. Izuku was going in and out of consciousness the whole time.

He must be really messed up. Why'd he do this to himself?

When they got to Katsuki's apartment, he paid the driver and hoisted Izuku out of the car. He didn't trust him to walk on his own this time, so he carried him into the building. Izuku wrapped his arms and legs around his chest like a small child. Thankfully he was on the first floor so he didn't need to go up any stairs. Although lean, Izuku was heavy.

When he got to the door of his apartment, he stood Izuku up for a moment to unlock the door so he could take him inside. Katsuki's apartment looked like you'd think it would. It was clean and organized, not a thing was out of place.

"Wow—Kacchan's place s'so perfect—Jus' like Kacchan."

Damn nerd.

Choosing to ignore the compliment, he sat Izuku down on the couch and went to the kitchen to get them some water, and to heat up something to eat. Izuku needed to eat something to soak up all the alcohol, and to relax his high. He also had a feeling he hadn't eaten anything before he left to go to Momo's.

Damn nerd takes such terrible care of himself.

Katsuki came back after a few minutes with a glass of water and a ramen cup. Katsuki knew they would come in handy someday. Kirishima brought them over as a joke gift when he moved in. Told him every college kid needed some cup noodles! Although disgusting, they'd be gentle enough on Izuku's stomach, and were easy to eat.

Izuku looked up at Katsuki with a dopey smile and gladly took the cup noodles and started eating them like it was the best thing he's ever ate, and the only thing he's eaten all day.

"Jeeze, slow down nerd. It's just shitty soup."

Stopping his slurping, he again gave Katsuki a sugary sweet doe eyed look and almost looked as though he would cry.

'But it was made by Kacchan! I love it.. Just like I love Kacchan..."

Izuku's face suddenly contorted into the ugliest expression Katsuki's ever seen on his face, and he dropped the now empty cup noodle container in his lap, and burst into full on hysterics. Tears and snot were streaming down his face almost instantly as he started to wail on Katsuki's couch.

"Oi! Oi! Stop that!"

"B-but, but but.. I-i-i ju-just t-toldd y-you th-that i lo-lov.."

Katsuki's scooped the blubbering boy up in his arms and took him over to the bathroom to wash his face, cutting off his words in the process.

"I heard what you said Deku. It's fine, your wasted. People say things they don't mean when they're messed up..."

Instead of calming down, Katsuki's words seemed to make him cry harder. After sitting Izuku down on the toilet seat, Katsuki quickly got a hand towel to run under warm water to wipe Izuku's face. Before gently wiping away his snot and tears, Katsuki kneeled down in front of him and brushed some hair off of his face.

"Oi, stop that Deku.. its okay.. I ah." Katsuki swallowed and took in a deep breath.

He's not gonna remember this tomorrow anyway.

"I ah. Ioveyoutoo. Now stop cryin' okay? Gah! I can't deal with you like this Izuku."

Izuku blinked a few times and seemed to start calming down. His breathing slowed as he tried to catch his breath. Katsuki started to wipe his face down with the warm cloth and handed him a tissue to blow his nose.

Katsuki's face was on fire. This was not what he planned to do tonight.

After he blew his nose he quickly threw it in the trash and started to calm down. As Izuku's breathing started to become more even, he went to look Katsuki in the eyes.

"Y-you y-you mean that?"

Katsuki cupped the sides of Izuku's face, and ran his thumbs under his eyes to wipe away the stray tears threatening to escape again.

"Course I do. Since when have I ever lied to you? S'always been you...Since we were twelve."

Katsuki hesitantly leaned in to press a kiss onto Izuku's forehead. Izuku went back to giving him that same dopey smile. Katsuki's stomach was in knots as he stood up to guide Izuku out of the bathroom to go to sleep.

"I gotta pee Kacchan."

Katsuki ruffled his hair and left the bathroom.

What am i doing? This is insane!

Katsuki turned on the hall light and started to pace up and down, his hands raking through his hair as he tried to come to terms with the fact that he told his most guarded secret to the number one person who it was supposed to be kept from.

The opening of the bathroom door—and the appearance of an almost naked Izuku—halted his thoughts. It wasn't just the fact that Izuku was wearing nothing but his boxers that silenced him. It was the scars.

Izuku's thighs were covered in hundreds of scars.

Some of which looked like they were just inflicted this morning. Izuku must be too tired, and out of it, to realize that now another one of his deepest and darkest secrets was out there in the open.

"Wh-what's wrong Kacchan?"

Izuku blinked his eyes a few times adjusting to the bright lights of the hallway as he held onto his clothes.

Katsuki's legs gave out and he collapsed in front of Izuku. His eyes were fixated on the hundreds of scars littered over Izuku thighs. Tears were forming at the corner of his eyes as his arms reached out to run his hands over them.

"Iz-Izuku.. W-why?"

Katsuki's hands hesitantly started to run over the scars on Izuku's legs, he was unable to meet the eyes of the suddenly much frailer looking boy in front of him. Deep, long, and precise, were these marks. Some of the marks were raised up, and looked like burns. The newer marks were still red and scabbed, and Izuku flinched a little when Katsuki's fingers brushed over them.

Izuku moved his hand to run through Katsuki's hair and massaged his scalp.

"I-im s-sorry Kacchan.. i-i told you t-the m-marks weren't on m-my arms... It's been s-so stressful Ka-Kacchan… I just c-can't stop."

The hand in Katsuki's hair moved up to the sides of his face gently lifting him up to look Izuku in the eyes. Katsuki slowly got up from his knees closed his eyes, and wrapped his arms around Izuku's small frame bringing him to his chest. He lifted him up to take them into the bedroom, flicking off the hall light as he walked into his room.

Katsuki lied Izuku down, and took off his shirt and pants so he could join him in the bed. Katsuki's strong arms hugged Izuku close to his chest, and he kissed the top of his head before wrapping them in his covers.

"Th-this needs to stop Izuku...I... I can't keep trying to save you." he whispered.

Izuku cuddled his face closer into Katsuki's warmth, letting the tears in the corners of his eyes to flow freely down his face.

"Shh.. It's okay Kacchan.. You don't need to save me anymore. J-just promise not to leave me? Be with me Kacchan. I've wanted you to be with me for too long. It won't cure everything...But it will be a start...p-please?"

Katsuki brought his hands up to wipe the tears from Izuku's face, and press a soft kiss onto his lips.

"I p-promise.. Never. Never again will I ignore you, or leave you alone."

A soft smile spread over Izuku's face as he stared into Katsuki's crimson eyes.

"Good.. because I just need you here."


End file.
